Monday, May 4, 2009

Overheard in dermatology

A classmate: Ugh- this whole specialty makes me want to gouge my eyes out with a punch biopsy.


It is a rather anti-climactic way to end medical school. Nine days of fungus ridden toenails, age spots (excuse me, solar lentigo) thinning hair, and EMERGENCY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pimples.

70% of the patients on the list had made an "urgent" appointment this morning. 100% of the patients had the least urgent medical conditions humanly possible. . . (in the vein of: "I've had this bump on my chin for seven years, it really bothers me!" Or: "My hands feel dry!! And they're peeling!!! Sometimes they itch!!!!!!!!!! What's happening to me??!!")



The highlight of the day for sure are the magical-derm-gnome consults. This guy is the dermatologist of the region. He's been practicing for about three of my lifetimes and is technically retired but hangs around the clinic to help out with tough cases (read: cases in which the doctor actually has to examine the patient and/or think). So every time our doctor encountered a patient who required him to move from the chair or :gasp: perform a physical exam, instead he would lift the phone and call a consult.

Within minutes and without a word, preceded by a giant magnifying glass, in trots this tiny squat little man, white hair flying in every direction (see above but without the hat). He silently examines the patient from head to toe with the magnifying glass glued to his eye and his face about 1/2 an inch from the patient's ulcerating rash. After thoroughly inspecting every inch of exposed skin (usually paying special attention to the armpits) while mumbling to himself, he proclaims his diagnosis in a thick Romanian accent, nods authoritatively, pushes up his glasses, and leaves, still nodding and mumbling, with the magnifying glass at the ready.

::I totally want one::

The doctor then of course prescribes steroid cream and a moisturizer (which is what he would have done regardless) and the patient goes on their way.

2 comments:

7 years said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
7 years said...

Very cool, I hope to be old and wise one day!
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